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Remember that scene in Pretty Woman where Vivian says “We’ll cop a squat under a tree somewhere” to Edward? Unlike Edward, who wasn’t sure what that meant, we totally get it. We’ve got a stack of books we’re dying to read and we’ve found some amazing, totally awesome places we want to cop a squat and read. We've got your back, Vivian.

Confession time: Before this month, I had never listened to a single audiobook. The closest I had ever come was watching an episode of How I Met Your Mother in which the characters listen to an audiobook in the car, and even that felt a little excessive for my hard-copy-loving self.

If you're near the West End of London this July, you're probably like, "What's with the long lines outside the Palace Theatre?" That is, until you remember that the Palace Theatre is home to the debut production of Harry Potter and the Cursed Child.  As London’s answer to the buzz around Hamilton (which has yet to reach the UK), Harry Potter and the Cursed Child is sold out until June 2017 – and the next round of tickets are eagerly awaited.

Samwise Gamgee is a man of many desirable traits. He’s courageous, resourceful, logical, and not to mention a loyal friend. But when he isn’t out helping Frodo save the world, you may find that Sam is a man of simplicity. And we have a feeling that Sam would know how to vacation in style. If you’re looking to kick back on vacation like Sam, rent a little bungalow. Trust us, Sam would totally stay in a quiet little one-story house by the shore, and he’d make sure to take a few essentials with him. Use these tips inspired by our favorite hobbit for your best vacation yet.

Potatoes and homegrown herbs and spices

Po-tay-toes. Boil ‘em, mash ‘em, stick ‘em in a stew. When stocking your beach bungalow, make sure you pick up a decent selection of potatoes. For real, what can’t they do? What can’t they be? The beauty of a quiet beach house is that you can stay in and cook your own meals if you wish to do so, and potatoes provide an endless amount of possibilities! As a gardener, Sam would also have a whole slew of homegrown herbs and spices, and so should you.

Frying pan

Keeping in line with food related items, the frying pan is crucial to your vacation needs, especially if your rented space isn’t already stocked with one. We think Sam would bring his own, anyway. It’s a comfort of home. To a foodie, the cooking utensil is every bit as important as the actual food. Plus, if all hell breaks loose, you can use your frying pan as a weapon like Sam did in Balin’s Tomb.

Pipe and pipe weed

Picture it. Hairy feet in the sand, book in lap, smoking a pipe, the waves whooshing back at low tide. Nothing else. This is your entire world, if only for a short while. Don’t worry if you aren’t a pipe smoker. Use it as decoration on a shelf in the main room of your bungalow. It adds a touch of elegance, if you will.

Bug repellent

Bug bites can wreck an otherwise perfect vacation. Being itchy is the worst. And if you’re anything like Sam, bugs are the ultimate foe, and spiders are the greatest evil of all. They might be even worse than Sauron. Avoid the bites by simply spraying yourself with repellent before heading outside. Douse yourself in it if necessary, and then keep it close by just in case. Be gone, spiders and bugs! You are not welcome here.

Access to a nearby buffet

Although Sam would probably stay in a good portion of the time, access to an all-day buffet would make his vacation absolutely perfect. Make sure your vacation spot is located close to a buffet so you can have breakfast, second breakfast, elevenses, luncheon, afternoon tea, dinner, and supper. Can’t miss those. Actually, do 24-hour buffets exist? Are those a thing? If so, plan your vacation location around that.

Your best friend

If you’re half as kind and loyal as Sam, you have a best friend who would love to come stay with you in your little bungalow by the shore. You can cook and read together, swim in the ocean, and have long talks at night while drinking tea and watching the stars. Friends like these are hard to come by, but once you find that person, your vacation is their vacation. Only they will say, “I can’t carry it for you…but I can carry you.” A friend is the greatest essential of all.

It’s the birthday of Frank L. Baum, and what better way to commemorate The Wizard of Oz author than to imagine ourselves in Oz, ruby-slippers and all?

And for those of you who have done more than watch the Judy Garland movie by reading the books, you know the Land of Oz gets way weirder than a bunch of munchkins and a city where everything is green. If you want to experience the real, gritty, Technicolor Oz, here are some destination spots that are off the beaten, yellow-brick-road.

The Country of the Quadlings

Photo courtesy of NYC Parks

Even though NYC will be in the midst of a heat wave next week, there are still plenty of cool literary events to attend. This week offers the opportunity to celebrate a ton of debut novelists, the chance to see cool art, as well as to learn about niche musical subcultures. Make sure to tweet at us (@QuirkBooks) to let us know where you went!