Geeky Beauty and the Beast

[Movie still from Beauty and the Beast (2017), Walt Disney Pictures]

We all know that Beauty and the Beast is a tale as old as time – but it doesn’t have to stay that way. What if we put a geeky spin on this classic tale of love? Let’s move away from the past and look into the future. Why, a love this historic could be…out of this world!  That’s right, folks, we’re talking Beauty and the Beast in space!

Instead of medieval France, this story is set in the future, hundreds of years from now in a galaxy far, far away. Think of space colonies, massive ships and space pirates! It’s a concept reminiscent of Star Wars, Firefly, and Mass Effect (pick your poison here): a future with aliens and humans living side by side. This galaxy isn’t perfect, of course; there are still bad guys, but more on them later. First, let’s meet our capable protagonist, Belle.

[Movie still from Beauty and the Beast (2017), Walt Disney Pictures]

Belle is no longer a Disneyfied Provençal maiden. Outer space travel is still dangerous, with many uncharted worlds, hence Belle is now a kick-butt space adventurer! She’s got the curiosity and the brains to explore mysterious, far-flung worlds. Being the second mate on her father’s spaceship means she’s in charge when he’s away. But when her father fails to return after exploring a seemingly abandoned floating castle, Belle goes to rescue him. There, she discovers that the castle is not as empty as she thought. That’s where the Beast comes in.

[Movie still from Beauty and the Beast (2017), Walt Disney Pictures]

The Beast is still the menacing creature that we all know and eventually love. The massive and hairy Beast makes a deal with Belle in exchange for her father’s safety, but instead of making her his captive (no Stockholm syndrome here), the Beast knows of Belle’s intelligence and wants her to help him break the sci-fi “curse” that has transformed him. That’s right: she’ll use her brains to remove the cybernetics a space witch cursed the Beast with. Time is running out, though, and they have just a few days to break the spell. This is made even more difficult by the appearance of the villains.

Every version of this story has a villain, whether it’s evil sisters or an unrequited love interest. In this retelling, the villains are a band of space pirates. Not just any pirates, mind you: these are robot pirates! These devious fiends are tired of jumping from stolen ship to stolen ship and are out to steal the Beast’s castle. The once-great floating fortress is now vulnerable to attack. But luckily for Belle and the Beast, they have a few friends to help them fend off the band of pirates.

[Movie still from Star Wars: Return of the Jedi, Lucasfilm]

The faithful crew in the Beast’s castle was also altered. Now they look like small, furry creatures (think Ewoks, but they sing!). These fierce fur balls defend the ship and give Beast and Belle the time they need to solve the curse. What will save the Beast, of course, is the power of love (isn’t it always?). Belle, realizing that she loves the Beast, kisses him and short-circuits his cybernetics. He turns back into the jaunty space adventurer he’d been pre-space witch.

After some genius mechanical calculations on Belle’s part, the castle and crew are also restored to their rightful forms, and the space pirates’ ships experience sudden engine failure. And then? Belle and her Beast live a happy and space-swashbuckling ever after. See? Even geeky reimagings have a happy ending!

Tell us what you think! How would you reinvent Beauty and the Beast?