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There are a few tear-jerkers set to come out in the near future (chief among them, the cinematic debut of John Green’s The Fault in Our Stars). Never fear, these simple steps will help you prepare mentally and strategically for tears and help keep your emotional outbursts as private as possible!

Bonus Tip: Find cute animals to help you out.

Now that the dark days of winter are gone, many people will set out to clear off some of the dark place in their homes. That’s right; we’re referring to the dreaded spring cleaning. While there are some who relish the opportunity to give their home a good scrubbing, many of us fear and loathe household chores.

But, thanks to The Complete Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook, we have some very important instructions on how to survive all the tasks on your to-do list, and maybe even have some fun while you’re at it (active imagination required for most of these).