Les Miserables on Broadway
From Les Miserables to Matilda, Broadway and has long had an obsession with turning our favorite books into two-hour. Not that we’re complaining- we may or may not have memorized the entire Very Potter Musical score- but we think they could go even further.
In hopes that some charitable soul with money to spend and a need for a script is reading, here are five books we’d love to see jump from the page.
The Three Musketeers (Alexandre Dumas): The fact that there is a musical about singing cats and not about D’Artagnan is a personal atrocity against humanity! Just think about all the fencing stunt opportunities! I’m just gonna go out on a limb and say that if you had the chance to see a bromance between singing, swash-buckling French human ninja turtles who have a thing for feathered hats, people would forget about that War Horse nonsense in a second.
The Canterville Ghost (Oscar Wilde): This short story about a ghost whose fruitless attempts to haunt a wealthy American family only to find his efforts completely futile is a comedy goldmine waiting to happen. Peter Capaldi could even play the performance-obsessed ghost and make good usage of some of his most prolific swear words while Dr. Who’s on hiatus.
The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy (Douglas Adams): I truly believe that the one thing that would finally push Arthur Dent over the edge- you know, besides having your home planet blown up by Jabba the Hutt wannabes and finding out the love of your life is dating a blonde Sam Rockwell- is if he were forced to sing through it.
The Princess Bride (William Goldman): All we know is that Wesley’s soliloquy about how he’s going to slowly torture somebody with the name Prince Humperdink deserves a literal standing ovation and we’ve always had an inkling that Inigo Montoya could have a career as a Spanish troubadour if he ever got that pesky revenge plan out of the way. Furthermore, if Billy Crystal revisited his role as Miracle Max we would never leave the theater.
There is a play in the works, but will it be a musical? We sure hope so!
The Hobbit (J. R. R. Tolkien): They already did
The Lord of the Rings in England, England, so I don’t really see why this is such an extraordinary request. Any excuse to bring back the Dwarf Chorus, really.
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Magali Roman is 25% student, 50% blogger/ professional ranter and 100% frustrated historical figure stuck in the 21st century. On her free time she reads French badly, tries to stop philosophizing but finds she Kant, and corrects everyone’s Spanish pronunciation. Follow her at @swagali_broman.